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Fore | Aft

++MOVE::

SO! I am clearing out my things so that I can move to Glastonbury. This is not another one of those things I've been saying for the past however-long. it WILL happen. things WILL change. I kind of have no choice this time, so much pulling from the Universe! I can be free, I can be me, I can see trees! And drink water from Red & White dragons eeeevery day. GLORY. Just. Such happy. And..... rainbowie optimism!

++ JOB::

To quote an awesomely weird Venture Bros character: "I looove mein jooob!" It. I. I love the whole thing, people might go "but it's not a REAL job, you don't need a degree or anything. It's just making coffee!" Fair enough, it might be something anyone can do, but it's something I *LIKE*. All the customers are wonderful and I want to bake them all a cake every day! JUST. UGH. This new supervisor is ridiculous and lametardedER than all hell and everything in it! She. I just... there are SO MANY THINGS that are annoying about her [we'll call her A. Was gonna use X but that's way too cool for her] and that she does wrong and everyone hates her and in the 4 months I was there maybe 2 or 3 customer complaint forms got filled out, all about not having enough variety of food. In the month that she's been there, the girl from reception said she's had LOADS of email complaints from people about A- her never ordering the most popular crisps, syrups, chocolates, snacks... and also her never DOING anything. When she DOES do things, people come back and specifically request that I or Yuki make their drinks because apparently when she does them it tastes nasty. I thought it was simple- coffee, hot milk, voila. How hard can it be to mess THAT up?! FOR REAL! Our customer complaint forms have run out, and we had a pretty fair-sized chunk of them. Loads of customers say to us "why is there such a long line of people waiting and she's just out there sitting down drinking tea?" I just shrug, cause... well. I don't know, how can I say to customers "because she's a lazy bitch?"?! Her job, what she gets paid extra to do, is to come in early, set up for breakfast, prepare & cook all of the croissants/Danish pastries, the soup, baked potatoes, beans & bread rolls for lunch, receive deliveries & put stock away, count stock, take temperatures of the refrigerators and take out the garbage ... but she makes US do all of it instead! As well as our own jobs! The only thing she actually does is the ordering on the phone, and today she said she's going to get us to do that as well. What *I* don't get is, with SO MANY complaints, how is she still there? Why isn't she fired?Q If I had *one* complaint about me [which I obvs totes wouldn't- as Karen said "they all love you, don't they?" ^_^ *SMUG*] I'd be out by the end of the week. A has had at least 50 complaints, and that's only the ones I know about, So. Why the flaming hightarded bastardfucking SHITKNOB does she still even have a job? She's fucking useless. End Of. Someone's getting loads of money for doing fuck-all. AND THAT. Well. If you r teh reador of my LJ for long enough, you *know* how venomous my tongue can get when I hold something in for too long... *seethes* Thank god I'm moving, eh, I can just give in my notice and train my middle fingers for 2 weeks so I can give her the best goodbye she'll ever get XD

++ BODY::

So recently with this whole YAY FREE FOOD job... I have of course gotten rather chunky. Yuki said about a month ago about my ass getting big [except she seriously did it in the cutest way. like... "when you came here, very skinny! Yesterday I saw you making potato and your ass like *puts hands out at ass level in grabby mode* BOOM! BOOM!"] And noticed that jeans don't fit around my tummy anymore. This actually, BEREEAVE IT OR NOT, didn't bother me [I NO, RITE?!?!] but. It got bad. Teh chestlumps are noticeably more prominent and THIS is where I take issue! I keep thinking... don't let it get bad like before... just. tone up a little. But that's what I said before :/ I don't want to be that. I FUCKING *LOVE* FOOD. I don't want to spend 5 hours doing hardcore exercise and then eat ONE slice of brown toast with exactly a third of a can of beans on it. and no butter. For the whole day that would be it. That's... really fucking lame and stupid. I just. When it started before it was just "oh I'll tone up a little" and got out of hand. I can't let that happen again :/ How lame is it to go out with friends and not even have a slice of pizza with them?! Or going to someone's birthday party and offending them by not accepting even a forkful of cake? a fucking forkful felt like death and it upsets me- I just look at that statement and think "whoever thinks like that is a retarded dickloser". God. If I ever get like that again I'll PAY any one of you to come and stab me in the face! [not the eyes tho plz]

++THE GUY ::

Okay so FINE. I was being ... me.... and tried to forget it. I don't want ....I can't have..... It ... Well. That didn't work. It just made me even more miserable than the initial thought of me having the potential to have feelings had done. I can't make any sense of it. I hardly know *anything* about this guy [we went out once but it wasn't even a date, just after work drink & fudz. We do have a literal!date planned to go see Avenue Q in Feb though I'm still not sure if it counts as the different kind of date- I have no idea about that kind of thing! I've only ever had 1 date!date in my life, and it lasted for about 3 weeks [not the date... although that *did* last until the next day. teehee! well whaddya expect, he introduced me to RENT, had long soft dark hair, and used his old "school prefect" tie to.... ANYWAY!]] but. The most logical and plausible idea I can produce is that Aliens abducted Kuma* and implanted a Monkey Magnet somewhere under his skin because It Just Won't Go Away. UGH. It.. UGH! HE HAS SUCH A GODDAMNED CUTE NOSE. I DON'T EVEN. SRSLY I DIE. I R must to plz find the Magnet and remove it. Nobody else can be allowed to have it, it's safer for everyone involved if it stays with me. :|

The other day something happened [not like... HAPPENED with us. I WISH XD some other random shoulda-been-left-in-high-school shit with another person] that led to us chatting the next day and because we had to whisper he stood closer to me than he ever did before and I was just like. Blank. I . GODDAMMIT. I am a big ole chickenheaded blabbermouth and can't stop throwing out verbal shit at anyone with ears. But sometimes I just... I can't. I can't stop looking at him but I also can't stand to see him at all ever BECAUSE he's so good. I'm glad and relieved when he's not there because I'm not used to being so nervous around someone, what with me being cock-of-the-walk, and all,, but then when he's not there I miss him. IT'S HORRIBLE. Like the other day he came in with some other people and laughed at something they said. His laugh is so gorgeously dorky, I just stood there and stared. I completely forgot I was at work and literally there was nobody else around me as far as I was concerned ... just. Sometimes I can't even talk to him, like a 7th Grade Nobody trying to ask out the Senior who's Captain of the football team. WHAT THE FLAMING FUCK IS THIS? BASTARD! DOES NOT HAPPEN PLZ. I almost don't even WANT it to go away, which freaks me the FUCK out. Even more.
*_*
And it's perfect that this is happening just as I'm moving away ¬_¬
I don't know if I'm sad about losing something that could have been good, or grateful for an escape from something else in a loooong long line of things that were once sweet but just turned sour in the end :(


*Kuma: Japanese for "bear". I use it in code with Yuki at work- there's this song from South Park S8 [ep : Good time with weapons] which is FUCKING AMAZING that I introduced her to [I actually did know the translation before I showed it to her]. Anyway there's this part that goes "ninja ga ....IMASUUU!" which means "ninja is HEEEERE!" so if I see him coming I sing "Kuma ga IMASUUU!" hahaha. HEEEHEHE :P


The words & translation:

Suburashi chin chin mono
[wonderful penis thing]

Kintame no kame aru *note: am not sure if they messed this up on purpose for comedy but the actual phrase for what they mean is Kintame no ke aru
[my balls have hair - or literally "balls hair on there is" :P]

sore no oto sarubobo
[over there is it the sound of a baby monkey...?]

iie! ninja ga imasuuuuuuu!
[NO! Ninjas are heeeeeeere!]


Hey hey let's go
Kinka suru
[fighting a fight]
Taisatsuna mono
[The important thing is]
PROTECT MY BALLS

Boku ga warui
[it's my fault]

So let's fighting

Let's fighting love!


Kono uta chotto baka
[this song is a little bit stupid]

wake ga wakaranai
[I can't understand/it doesn't make sense]
Eigo ga mecha kucha
[English language is all fucked up]
daijobu! we do it all the tiiiime!
[it's ALRIGHT! we do...]

Hey hey let's go
Kinka suru
[fighting a fight]
Taisatsuna mono
[The important thing is]
PROTECT MY BALLS

Boku ga warui
[it's my fault]

So let's fighting

Let's fighting love!

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me at Uxfest 2003
purplethings
Kody Chuck Kane [AKA Bubba Moonpie]

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